The Soundtrack to Eating: Hot Sauces and Hotter Songs

We know you were waiting for it: we gathered our favorite hot sauces and paired each one with the music that best represents it. No, Pitbull’s “Fireball” did not make the cut.

The Soundtrack to Eating is a series in which staff writers write about how food and music are intertwined.

Written by Micaela Garza, Dylan Keesee, Adithya Srinivas, & Mark Yoder
Illustrated by Mark Yoder

Hot sauces have been around for hundreds of years and date back to the original hot sauce: eating food that is still on fire. With the internet web series “Hot Ones” gaining so much attention for its high profile guests and great interviewing, it seems that hot sauces have never been more popular. In an attempt to cash in on the trend, we decided to create our own lineup and pair each one to a song (and one album) that we feel reflects it the best. Join us as we move from the least spicy to most spicy according to the (subjective and useless) Scoville scale, giving ourselves heartburn and upset stomachs in order to provide content for Afterglow.

1. Texas Pete: “Old Town Road (Remix) ft. Billy Ray Cyrus, Young Thug, & Mason Ramsey” — Lil Nas X

Photo courtesy of TW Garner Food Company

Texas Pete is one of the quintessential diner hot sauces, and it does not disappoint. Pete lassos you in with some great southern cooking flavor, but he’s also got some fun little pops of heat to keep the rodeo going. We all know Lil Nas X and Billy Ray Cyrus bring some of that country-twang energy, but to really match Texas Pete’s mild but simmering spice and character, you have got to include the unapologetic exuberance of Young Thug and Mason Ramsey’s verses. Together, the quartet put together a one-of-a-kind southern summer banger to rival Texas Pete’s popularity. — Adithya Srinivas

2. Valentina: “Let The Beat Build” — Lil Wayne

Valentina might turn your insides bright red, and it’s probably going to kill you when it eventually gives you cancer from the Red 40, but wow is it good. The flavor is unparalleled, offering a tangy beginning and slowly bringing the heat as it sits in your mouth… just like “Let The Beat Build” by Lil Wayne. The song starts simply, with just the Eddie Kendricks sample and Lil Wayne’s verse, and slowly adds drums and bass until it reaches it peak and fully blows you away. And who knows, maybe “Let The Beat Build” will kill you too — I don’t think there have been any studies. — Dylan Keesee

3. Sriracha: “Tokyo Drift” — Teriyaki Boyz

Red bottle. Green Cap. Sriracha is an instantly recognizable sauce and is one of the few Asian hot sauces that has become ubiquitous in the US after setting the world on fire with its delicious and fiery blend of garlic and chili peppers. It is a guaranteed crowd pleaser and brings an easily digestible Asian flair to any dish. “Tokyo Drift” from “The Fast and The Furious: Tokyo Drift” shares a similar role — the Teriyaki Boyz acted as ambassadors of the Japanese hip-hop scene and brought an iconic hit to the U.S. with the thrilling combination of rapid-fire raps and catchy Pharell production. — Mark Yoder

4. Tapatio: “Sauce It Up” — Lil Uzi Vert

The mariachi on the bottle of Tapatio is like the Mexican equivalent of Lil Uzi Vert — cute and fiery! Lil Uzi pairs well with anything, just like Tapatio does with your food — whether it be brunch or dinner. Both the artist and the sauce have just the right mix of spiciness and easygoing vibes to make you wanna “Sauce It Up” on your playlists and your plates. — Micaela Garza

5. Tabasco: “Smack A Bitch” — Rico Nasty

Hailing from Louisiana, this spicy vinegar based pepper sauce is a certified American staple and has been replacing blandness with tangy Cajun heat for over a hundred years. It only has three ingredients, but it packs a punch with flavor and extreme acidity that instantly takes over. Rico Nasty similarly makes her present felt on “Smack a Bitch.” It’s a simple yet captivating track, with Rico’s voice harshly cutting through a distorted guitar beat as she braggadociously yells at her haters. If you are ever in need of something that will unapologetically slap you in the face, Tabasco and “Smack a Bitch” are both great options. — Mark Yoder

6. Yellowbird: “Jesus Forgive Me, I Am A Thot” — JPEGMAFIA

Don’t let the cute little bird and bright orange color fool you — Yellowbird Habanero comes at you hard. It’ll try to fool you first though, starting with a sweet and flavorful explosion that tastes surprisingly great. Once you settle in, however, so will the spice, which takes over and dominates your palette. But don’t worry, once that heat subsides, the flavor stays behind to comfort you. The Jekyll and Hyde hot sauce gets paired with a Jekyll and Hyde song, JPEGMAFIA’s “Jesus Forgive Me, I Am A Thot,” which leads in with gentle piano and mellow vocals, promising to be one of Peggy’s calmer cuts. But on a dime, the beat goes manic and abrasive as the verses are delivered wildly and violently. JPEGMAFIA and this habanero sauce are Yellowbirds of a feather who’ll both leave you saying “Jesus Forgive Me, That Was Hot.” — Adithya Srinivas

7. Diablo: Jesus Is King (the whole album) — Kanye West

Upon first listen, JESUS IS KING was underwhelmingly painful, as is the flavor of Torchy’s Diablo sauce. Despite the church choir and biblical references, Kanye West’s gospel album seems to suffer from the poison of Satan — and Satan poisoned our stomachs with his Diablo sauce. Even though Diablo sauce is supposed to be the hottest sauce offered at Torchy’s, it’s about as spicy as Chick-Fil-A sauce. Torchy’s might as well be “Closed on Sunday” too. — Micaela Garza

8. Dave’s Gourmet Ghost Pepper Hot Sauce: “I’ll Beat Yo Azz” — Crime Mob

Dave might sound like a bland, scrawny man, but he is really a 6’8,” 250-pound professional cage fighter. Dave saw you litter on the street and he wants you to know that your behavior is unacceptable the only way he knows how: by lighting your mouth on fire. Crime Mob sums it up perfectly in their 4 word chorus, “I’ll Beat Yo Azz.” And I can say with all honesty that this beat our collective “azz.” — Dylan Keesee

All in all, every sauce is tasty and each one has a specific time and place it shines best, just like the music that was paired with it. There was only one exception to this: Kikkoman Wasabi Sauce. It was so upsetting and underwhelming that we decided we could only pair it with Chance The Rapper’s The Big Day.

AESTHETICSAfterglow ATXDecember 12, 2019